According to wiki, soulmate is a term sometimes used to designate someone with whom one has a feeling of deep and natural affinity, love, intimacy, sexuality, spirituality and/or compatibility.
Um, well I don't think that that definition is entirely true. I remember telling Jimmy ages ago that I don't believe in them, I lied. I do now. XD. But I believe that soulmates don't always have to take the form of one who you desire sexually. They can be a best friend, parents (as unappealing as that may sound), cousins, aunts, uncles.. practically anyone who you feel like you have a deep connection with. Someone who can tell you inside out and accepts you for who you are, ugly flaws included.
I believe I've found my soulmate. Only took 14 years to find him and 19 years to realize it. =P I don't think there's any need for me to mention his name, right? You all know who I'm talking about. I don't just think of him as my boyfriend. He's my best friend too. I can tell him anything.. even if i don't, he can tell what I'm about to say even before I open my mouth.. For me, he never got away. Baha, makes it sound like I'm stalking him or something. XD
I believe that everyone one of us will find that special person that we can cherish forever. =)
Soulmate - Natasha Beddingfield.
Aren't the lyrics awesome?
Incompatible, it don't matter though
'cos someone's bound to hear my cry
Speak out if you do
You're not easy to find
Is it possible Mr. Loveable
Is already in my life?
Right in front of me
Or maybe you're in disguise
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
Here we are again, circles never end
How do I find the perfect fit
There's enough for everyone
But I'm still waiting in line
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
If there's a soulmate for everyone
Most relationships seem so transitory
They're all good but not the permanent one
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
Who doesn't long for someone to hold
Who knows how to love you without being told
Somebody tell me why I'm on my own
If there's a soulmate for everyone
If there's a soulmate for everyone
Is there a moment in everyone's lives when you wake up and just find that you're so blessed to be surrounded by the people who love you most? I'm terrified. I'm terrified because lately, my memory's been degrading immensely. I'm scared that one day, I'll wake up and won't remember who's that guy next to me, or who my best friend is. I don't want to end up like the girls in The Notebook and 50 First Dates. But I guess if you wake up and all you feel is pain from the very first moment you open your eyes to when your head hits your pillow, the best thing is to forget it all.. or just don't care. Both of them are so hard to do..
Nowadays, I'm a bit hesitant in trusting the people around me. Except for a select few. I now know how it feels to be on the recipient end of broken promises. I once made a promise to someone who meant so much to me, I thought I would do anything and everything for them. Within a month of making that promise, I broke it. I'm not sure if that person was hurt deeply or not because I'm certain I didn't mean jack to him, but if he did care, I now know how he felt. When you've known someone for 1/3 of your life, you feel like you can trust them and you'll believe whatever they say. So when they make promises to you, you kind of expect them to keep it because somehow you think you mean quite a lot to them. Imagine my surprise when they broke it. Not just once, a couple of times. How can you expect me to trust them after that? How do I know everything they said u until now was the truth? But you know what the silly thing is? No matter how much they hurt me, I'll still trust them with my life. I wish I could be strong like Vath or Janet and just stand for what I believe and love but I'm too weak or as Janet puts it, too nice. ==.
Wow, just by talking to a few of my guy friends, I just realized that we can't tell what our hearts to think or do. We can't tell them to stop liking a person like that *clicks for dramatic effect*. They're all having problems with their love interests and smacking themselves on the head for falling for them.
Is it possible to still have feelings for your ex or a person that you loved after you've broken up or have said 'no, I don't like her/him anymore'? I'm just curious, but do any of you guys have a person that's your .. in a sense.. guilty pleasure? Even if you don't talk to them anymore, is there someone that you're willing to do anything for no matter what? More so than others?
Anyways, I think I've written enough.
Ciao.
- Location:in my room
- Mood:
exhausted - Music:Slow dancing in a burning room - John Mayer
So the 3rd of October was my and Anthony's six month. Seems like only yesterday we were celebrating our one month. Well anyway, from the 2nd month, we had all these elaborate and romantic plans but guess what we did? Had brunch with his family, came back home and watched movies. XD Why you may ask? I fell ill like a week before and then he caught it so we spent our six months, practically passed out on his living room floor while the tv was on. XD. I don't mind. I thought it was nice =). Who says we need to do anything complicated to celebrate?
So yesterday on the 6th of October, I went over to Anthony's house to hang. We were looking up random stuff on his laptop and watching Naruto in the morning, and then set off for Blockbuster to rent movies and KFC/McDonalds for lunch. Oh! I got my first rose yesterday. =) Nice surprise. I thought Anthony abandoned me when he told me to go rent movies and he'll 'be back'. I browsed aimlessly in the horror section looking for any decent movies. Only me, the chick who was working and this other random guy were in the store. I was starting to get irritated looking to see if Anthony was coming when he walked in with a rose. lol. Sounds cheesy doesn't it? Don't worry, it wasn't a random gift, he bought it for me coz i told him ages ago that I wanted a single rose for our six months. He just forgot on our six months and decided to get it for me two days later. XD
I'm so sick of the doctors atm. I've been like 4 times in the past 2 weeks. ==. Stupid week immune system. I feel constantly tired and dizzy nowadays. *sigh* Maybe because I only get 2 - 6 hours sleep each night. ==. Watching 'The Strangers' didn't help either.
OH! There's this movie that I really want to watch but Anthony won't let me and the twins are disapproving of it too. It's called 'I Spit On Your Grave'. It's about this writer who goes to the countryside to finish her book but she gets raped and assaulted by four guys. They then leave her and she comes back on a killing rampage. The rape scene apparently takes up half of the movie and is very grahic. I just want to watch it for the experience. You all probably think i'm a freak. Heh.
I remember earlier writing something about my disapproval of people causing harm to themself. I take that back. I finally understand what could possibly possess someone to mutitlate themselves. When emotional pain takes you so deep down within itself, physical pain is the only thing that is strong enough to distract you and bring you back ..
Wow, April was the last time I blogged?! Time flies, huh?
Well, lets see what’s changed between April and now. It’s only been three months. Well, I went on a trip down to
Hmm.. probably about 2 and a half months out said three months was probably spent with my boyfriend XD. I used to watch my friends one by one, disappear off the face of the earth because they were so involved with their boyfriend. I used to laugh and question how they could do that. How they could put their families and friends second place to their boyfriend. And now I know why they did it. I know you single people out there are probably thinking I’m some love crazy girl, but trust me, once you’re in a relationship, you can’t stop thinking about that one person, and you’ll find any time at all (no matter how small) to spend with them. It doesn’t even matter what we’re doing, just as long as I’m with him. Funny how fast time goes when I’m with him.
I haven't properly introduced him, have I? Well, I've known him for five years now. Maybe I'll tell you guys more about him another day.
Looking at the people around me, it seems to me that everyone’s got a certain amount of fakeness to them. Random example, say I had this really super super super cool and nice friend, right? And then a week later, I find out that she’s been talking about me behind my back. Does anyone else have these types of friends?
Oh my god, I found THE most gorgeous dress ever. It ends just above my knee and it’s strapless and it’s a peach shiny colour. ^^. Actually made my legs look good because they’re usually fat and short. XD.
I know I've hurt a lot of people by going out with Anthony, i used to worry about it so much, but now i just don't give a crap. Why is it their business who he goes out with? As long I'm still close to my loved ones, I don't care anymore.
You know how when you get addicted to something particular, you just can't stop thinking about it 24/7? Hah, well atm, I really want an adidas bag. Don't ask me why, I've never owned anything close to anything related to sports, however, I was walking in the city with some friends the other day, and we walked into adidas. And now, here I am, wanting one. I'm sure after a month, I'll stop using it, hah.
I find it weird how people jump from one relationship into another. My friend ( I won't say his name), within 3 weeks of breaking up with his long time girlfriend, has already found another girlfiend. Doesn't anyone else find it strange?
Who thinks I need a fringe cut? LOL ( I know, I'm all over the place atm, just starting random topics, don't blame me, it's 12.37 am, my brain's sort of dead) I want to define my fringe a bit more, but I dont' want to make a decision without some opinions first. So yeah, comment with your opinions =].
Haha, I feel like I have nothing to talk about, this is how my life is right now, boring.
After mum came back from Sydney, she has never stopped talking about her best friend's son, Philip. Gosh, I swear, whenever I hear about him, I get so frustrated. Mum always points out how 'perfect' he is. And I'm not kidding, he does sound perfect, but why is she shoving it in my face? He's rich, he's smart, he has a secure job at 21 years of age and he's the 'best' son. ==" If she somehow wants to turn me into something like him, it isn't going to happen.
- Mood:
sleepy - Music:My life would suck without you - Kelly Clarkson
The sauce wasn't supposed to be like that, it was supposed to be hard enough for me to be able to pipe it on... oops. Oh well, it tasted delicious, and in the end, that was all that mattered.
Think you know me? Think again. You might discover something =]. And plus, it’s Friday the 13th, another reason for me to write something related to the number 13.
- I constantly bicker with my mum, but I truly love her. I don’t think I could ever survive without her. Even if she were to kick me out, I’d be back the next day, and she’d accept me with open arms (of course, accompanied with a ‘I told you so’ look).
- I love baking, but I’m not a big fan of cooking. Weird isn’t it? I just find baking much more relaxing, and plus I’m a sweet type of person.
- I love buying useless stuff. I can’t help it, everytime I go out with my friends, I have to spend money. If I don’t, I feel really uncomfortable. And while we’re on the topic of ‘stuff’, I can’t stand cheap stuff. I know, I sound like some arrogant spoilt child. Cheap stuff make me feel like I’ve been ripped off, quality wise.
- I treasure every one of my friends. I consider them my non blood related family (did that make any sense at all?). I feel that I will do anything for them. Karen, Asheema, Jimmy, Ken, Matt, Rebekah, Kristen, Hafsa, Dil, Kylie, Divya and Anthony. (I’m sure there are way more people, and if I haven’t gotten you in here, doesn’t mean I don’t love you). Thank you for being there for me. Even if you’re not a good comforter at rough times, I still enjoy talking to all of you when we’re in happy ones.
- I recently just became close again to my cousin, Vath. I could say ten things right now, but for this moment, I’m just going to say that I’m grateful that we’re close again (yes, I know this will make you puke =P).
- I can’t live without my ipod. I know it makes me sound like those insane girls who can’t go anywhere without their headphones stuck in their ears. But I’m like that. Take my phone away from me? That’s fine. But my ipod? I can’t concentrate unless I know that my ipod is with me.
- I have a fear of speaking to people who work in retail. To me, they set out to intimidate you.
- I believe that everything happens for a reason, so when something goes totally wrong, I don’t blame anyone. I believe that whatever it was, was supposed to happen, and that that was the best outcome for me to shape into a better me in the future.
I’m currently single, in nameand mentally. Meaning I don’t like anyone right now. I’m not sure if I’m okay with that, because ever since high school, I’ve always had crushes, one after the other, and now that I don’t like anyone, it feels really weird.
- I’m freaking terrified of big lizards. They’re my worst fear. I’m okay with cockroaches, spiders, but I freaking hate lizards. They scare the crap out of me. My sisters tried getting rid of this fear by buying a lizard pen for my birthday. (How wonderful).
- I don’t like people who harm themselves to gain attention. Self mutilation. I think it’s wrong. And desperate.
- I adore horror movies. Even though they scare the crap out of me at night, to the point where I can’t sleep, even though I’m sleeping in my parents room with my parents, I still watch them. Everytime I finish watching a horror movie, I say to myself, this is the last one. No more. But it happens again. I think the Thai’s make the best horror films, the rest just suck to me. American ones are okay, like Saw =].
- I have a freakish obsession with necklaces. I always buy them. Even if I don’t end up wearing them anyway, I love them. I’m going to be such a great money saver when I grow up.
- Location:in front of the computer
- Mood:
giddy - Music:tangled - Maroon 5
Well, anyways! I had an amazing day on Friday with a bunch of very much loved ones to celebrate my birthday =]. We didn't do anything special. Just the usual. Although it was really ordinary, I guess I was so concentrated on the people than rather what was happening. Some of them, I hadn't seen for ages, like Kristen, I haven't seen her since *thinks*... November? So long!
First we went to the Pancake Manor, had breakfast there and then pool for two hours. I won a bet against Jimmy *jumps up and down* (I swear, this is the last time I'm going to say it. So.. ipod touch huh?) I'm so rusty with pool coz I haven't played in ages. Damn Anthony for buying me a HUGE teddy! After pool, we went to karaoke and sung to our hearts content. (More, like I did xD, hey it's my birthday, I deserve to let loose). It was really funny, we were carrying the cake around everywhere xD. (btw Karen thanks so much for the cake even though I said it would be okay with icecream =] ). I finally got sticker photos with Anthony and Jimmy! I'm very content. And the photos actually turned out pretty nice. Momo kept getting in the way xD. Momo ='s the humongous teddy.
Dinner was nice. Ihad dinner at Michael's Oriental with family, Karen and Vath. Hah.. Vath, Karen and I were so full, we weren't able to fully take in the flavour. Lesson definitely learnt. Too bad Karen couldn't come and sleepover. We would've taken full care of you! =].
So it was left with me and Vath. We stayed up till 4.30 just talking about random gossip. Lol. And in between, she bugged random friends on msn. xD. It was interesting to see where the conversation went. And I am so not a lonely raccoon.... *death glare* =P. And we woke up at 7.00 to run around the block... I was like .... gahh ... dead ..... xD.
Just, thank you so much for coming guys =]. You guys truly made my day =D.
- Location:at the computer
- Mood:
happy - Music:Big Bang
HAPPY 15th BIRTHDAY!!!!
YAY! You can watch M rated movies now. =P
YAY! You can watch M rated movies now. =P
Anzac biscuits was one of them, although they turned out more to be like oatmeal biscuits. Whatever it's called, it was really yummy, dad kept coming back for me xD, and plus they're really easy to bake too!
Point of Story? I'm really getting into baking. I feel like baking all the time. I don't even have to eat whatever I'm baking, I just want to bake.
*psychotic rampage of a lunatic XD*
- Location:in the kitchen
- Mood:
accomplished - Music:Love Like Oxygen - SHINee
Anyways, where was I? Oh right, After the Huka Falls, we moved onto the Waitomo Caves. Famous for their glow worms ^_^. They were SOOOO pretty! They were like stars, literally. We had to go like 150 metres underground. It was freezing, and quite scary because of all the darkness.
After the caves, we went horse riding. It was SOOO awesome!!! =D =D =D. I loved it! I'm even thinking of taking horse riding classes ^^.
Well, that was short for part 2.. I would elaborate, but i'm watching LOTR at the same time, so I'm slightly distracted xD.
I was born in New Zealand, and haven't been there in 12 years. Needless to say, I couldn't remember much of it, only little flashes. So I was quite excited. Ever since I could remember, I always dreamed of coming back to New Zealand, but I honestly thought that I would never be able to come back. So here, I'd like to share with you a little recount about my experience there.
So we left Brisbane at 10 pm Australian time, arrived in Auckland 4 am NZ time. *dies*. I didn't get any sleep at all on the plane. The airplane seats are stupid. Can't, lean or anything. No way on getting any sleep ==". Dad rented a car out and we set off for Wellington (my place of birth). I don't know if you've seen a map of New Zealand yet, but there are two islands. Auckland is on the top of the North Island and Wellington is RIGHT at the bottom ==". We set out at 4 in the morning and we finally got to Wellington around 8 - ish at night. It was SOOOOO tense! Not the atmosphere, just having to sit in the same position for 16 long hours ><. Oh and by the way, it is freezing there. I was surprised, because it's supposed to be summer there, but the moment I got off the plane, I was shivering. But for me, it was good, coz i prefer cold then hot. Don't we all? =P
Next few days, was mainly us driving around Wellington, meeting up relatives, and going to our old house. Gosh, so many memories! Well, mainly because of the baby tapes that mum makes us watch xD. But I was actually quite suprised at how 'at home' I felt the moment we drove into Wellington. I felt like I had been living there for ages. I am so sick of chips right now. Every single day in New Zealand, we had hot chips. At first we were like 'yay! chips', by the third day it was more like 'yay..... chips ==" ' xD. I never thought it was possible for me to be sick of chips xD.
On the third day, we set out for South Island to see snow. A little background information, I LOVE SNOW!!! I've always wanted to touch it.. or at least see it. XD. Me and my siblings were really hyped up about it. We caught a ferry, one of those really huge ones where you can bring your car along with you too. We got off at Picton, and drove for 8 hours to Mount Cook (famous for it's snowy mountains and beautiful scenery). So imagine our frustration when we got to Mount Cook and was told that we couldn't go touch the snow coz it's too windy... and plus there's only a little bit of snow on the top of the mountain. ==" So we drove all the way back to Auckland (boat ride included). Point of mini story: WE WASTED 3 DAYS TO SEE NOTHINGNESS ><!!!!
Anyways, I'll post the picture that showed the most prettiness of one of the mountains xD.
So close, yet so far xD. On the way back to Auckland, we stopped at Huka Falls. Two words: amazingly beautiful.
I'll let the picture explain everything =].
The colour was literally blue. It was so awesome! Dad told us a little story about it. Apparently there was this explorer, he went to have massage at a place nearby the Huka Falls, his masseuse accidentally touched the wrong nerve and he died. And so then her husband and her dumped his body in the Huka Falls o_O. True story. According to dad xD
Well that's the end of part 1. I will return later to finish the rest of my recount =D.
- Mood:
hyper
Asheema:
Gosh, the first time I met you, I knew straight away that we were going to be friends right away. We've had one amazing year together. We've laughed together at the the most silliest of things. You've been there everytime I asked for you. Especially in the month of August and onwards. You have helped transform a weak self conscious teenager into someone confident and can hold her head up high. I feel like that you are one of very few people who can accept me for who I am.
Jimmy:
Hah, even though there's practically an entire entry dedicated to you already, I'm sure everyone knows you're special enough have another written about you. Well, where do I start? I think I met you June/July of 2007? In that one day, all I thought of 'Jimmy' was 'quiet dude who's not interesting at all'. Boy, was I wrong.. Jimmy
Ricky:
It felt like we just clicked straight away, didn't it? The first msn conversation that we had was filled with laughter and smiles. Thank you for just being there while I ramble on and on about my life. I will always treasure our friendship =].
Karen:
Last of all, even though I didn't meet her in 2008, I still want to write something about her. I'm sure you can guess who you are. My little blue bird. I really don't know where to start with you. You're just the sweetest most caring friend that I have had the honour to come across. In these two years, you've showed me the true meaning of friendship. You've just been the most amazing friend that anyone can have.
I only have two words for every one of you, thank you.
My heart goes completely to you two at this hard and difficult, and remember, even though it's hard to give life, it's not impossible.
I don't know why, but I've been thinking about him a lot lately. Hearing his name before used to cause butterflies within me, but now, nothing is left but hurt and anger. I just keep thinking back to how stupid I was. How could I have let him fool me so easily? Everytime I think of him, I just feel so angry. It's actually not even hurt anymore .. it's just anger. And the worse part is that he still thinks I like him. Gah. I think, no matter what I do, it'll always seem like I like him even though I don't. I just want to forget about him, just think of August as a bad dream that I've already woken up from. I don't even want him to talk to me. If we were to cross roads in the future, I just wish that he'd ignore me and keep walking. Just please stop messing with my life. When I've actually finally moved on, why does he make everything so difficult for me? Don't I deserve at least a bit of peace?
Just please, leave me alone now. Leave me be.
Nothing else to write atm.. except i'm talking to my friends less and less coz of work. *sigh*
- Mood: accomplished
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sujuobssessed- Ms. La La.
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